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Category: Pregnancy

The seemingly insurmountable peaks and valleys of ‘trying’

I have known forever that I want two children. Friends shake their heads at the living embodiment of a cliché that I am and it is true too; if I had been raised in the West, I am sure my idea of an ideal home would include a white picket fence. So I’ve always had…

Two pink lines!

Well, that’s what this blog was supposed to be called. Two pink lines for that much-awaited (much-dreaded?!) sending-a-shiver-down-your-spine outcome on a bathroom floor that turns your entire life upside down for better or for worse. I got mine more than a year ago, on a rainy August morning, in a test taken sneakily while the…

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Until Rumi came along, it was this boy who had the baby spot in my life and heart! An age difference on almost 7 years meant bathing and changing him, having him tag along when i played with my friends and taking him to movies like Spiderman where he promptly got frightened and sat on my lap the whole time! Happy Raksha Bandhan Saifu, all the love in the world to you!❤ #brotherandsister #thisboy

CONFLICT RESOLUTION Rumi has been having some trouble with her friends since about 2 weeks ago. It started with name calling and pushing, and it was a 2 vs 1 situation as the other girls are cousins, about a year older than her. These girls are a little more aggressive, even verbally, where they have commented to Rumi about us her parents, for e.g. how your mum is just 'sitting' at home and not working (they would have heard such comments by their own parents / caregivers). About 2 weeks ago, we heard her scream and cry and we ran downstairs to find her howling, these others had apparently pushed her. My husband scooped her up but before he could talk to the other kids, their mum called them and whisked them away. The next day when she joined them for play, the girls told her that their mum told them they should not play with Rumi anymore as she is a troublemaker and also that she would scold Rumi if she saw her. So almost due to no fault of hers, R has stopped going down. She has another friend but these cousins tell that other girl too to not include Rums. My question is: what is the best way to deal with this in the long run? For now she is happy and otherwise engaged and doesn't really miss them. But my husband feels that living like this in the same society is not so good in the long run. His way of dealing with such conflicts is always going and talking clearly. I am not for this because i have had negative experiences in the past with this family and also i am hurt about the comments they have passed about our lifestyle. I feel that we have completely different value systems as families and even if we do talk now, some issues will keep coming up again and again. But I am worried that my daughter will eventually feel left out in our building especially for things like birthday parties (if she doesnt get invited etc.) My way is usually to avoid the stressor and 'get on a different energy path' so I am more than happy for Rumi to not play with them and actively help her make plans with other mates. What do you guys think? Would love your inputs, i ve been so anxious about whether im handling this the right way...Thank you so much!

What are your views on kids watching scenes that have kissing in them? Brought up in a culture where physical contact between parents was non-existent, and kissing scenes in movies were always embarrassing, shameful and something to avert our eyes from, we are striving to create a more honest culture for Rumi where kissing need not be something yucky and cringe-worthy. A new blog post on this, the link is in the bio. As always i would really love to hear your thoughts! #raisingrumi #consciousparenting #letstalkaboutsexbaby

Yesterday I attended a parent-teacher meeting at Rumi's school. As I was leaving, another parent, a mum, rushed to me and said she wanted to tell me something and here is what she said: "I've been sitting in school since my boy is still struggling with me leaving him. When we all sat to lunch, your girl sat opposite us. She had carrot koshimbir in her dabba and my son was attracted to the bright orange and kept watching her. When she noticed this, she brought over a big portion of her dabba to him and asked him to eat it. Let me know if you want anymore, i'll give you more she said." How my heart swelled in that moment with joy. In moments where i wonder if we are doing right and enough by Rumi, this memory will serve to remind me that we are getting some things right. I always knew she is very kind but being told of this by a perfect stranger brought me so much joy! And a big shoutout to this kind mum who stopped me to share a lovely story about my child. These lovely people who pass on the nice stuff, who compliment strangers are the ones that make the world such a magical place. Thank you new mum for this story, and thank you Rumi for stopping and making lunch time better for another little child. My cup runneth over. #raisingrumi #rumiisjoy #ofloveandkindness #kindnessoninstagram #thoughtfulgestures #happinessis #theseareafewofmyfavorite #mommyblogger #indianparentingblogs #gentleparenting

A couple of days back I saw this lovely child reciting the periodic table and I clicked on her Facebook profile and saw that she is a well-known child artist on TV and acts so confidently in all these ads with stars and actors. And she holds the record for being the youngest person to recite the National anthem too. "Do you remember how old Rumi was when she used to recite the National anthem?" I asked my husband nonchalantly but he laughed and teased me about being a competitive Tiger Momma and we left it at that. Today I found this video on my phone and realised that she was quite little when she used to sing and may as well have made some kind of record had I even known or thought about this thing earlier! This is where I always find myself in a dilemna; how far are you to take your child's talents or push them and help them to peak? Or is it better to slow down, focus on empathy and enjoying each moment without really worrying too much? Loosening up or tightening the reins a bit? We believe that Rumi is so bright but we also believe that every child is super bright to their parents. We believe her strength lies in being wordy and verbal and articulate so we fill up her spaces with books and stories. I genuinely believed music would do her fiery temperament a world of good so he have persevered with violin. We take her for gymnastics so that she learns to be agile. But I grapple all the time with the eternal 'Are we doing enough question' so much! What if we have been gifted a bright shiny diamond but we are all at home chilling, reading, not doing much to 'polish it' so to say? On the other hand, isn't it enough to really savour ordinary moments, cook, laugh, make art, hug - it feels so good it doesn't quite feel wrong! What does your parenting style lean towards? Do you tend to push your kids to be achievers? How do you strike the balance between an optimisation of talents without too much unnecessary pressure? I would love to hear your thoughts! #raisingrumi #slowparenting #mommyblogger #rumiisjoy #thenationalanthem

I've been struggling for a long time with Rumi's sensitivity and how she has such a hard time with her friends. But I realised that I am unable to accept these parts of her because they actually remind me of the most painful parts of myself. I've written on the blog after very long and I would really love any thoughts and inputs as this is a topic I have a really hard time with. The link is in the bio, and this is me as a little girl. #raisingrumi #parentingstruggles #thehighlysensitivechild #dealingwithemotions #parentingblogs #mommyblogger #gentleparenting #selflove #selfacceptance

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